When I was growing up, I didn't understand death very well ---who does?  I am still as much in the dark as the rest of you in reference to many aspects of it, but like many of you ---I won't be in the dark long, as I live in the Light.  We tend to think of this more as our parents get older, and health issues become more evident and prominent.  I was very thankful when my brothers felt that Mom could use some help after a knee surgery.  Dad is always very helpful, but who knew that he'd get sick at that very time ...so he was unable to help much.  God knew, and having three of my brothers working together was a big help ...and a comfort to me, as well as to my parents.


Recently, Dr. Phil had a show that was addressing health issues, not with parents, but with children.  I know many people who said they like Dr. Phil's show ...and though I don't often watch much on TV, I found myself looking into this show.  The concern was over parents having children that needed constant care, and the need to be housed in a care facility.   The parent voiced a concern over the quality of life of children within the facility ...particularly her own.  I did not see the whole show, so it is not going to be the center of what I'm going to say, but the part I saw began with Dr. Phil asking how do we really know the quality of life they are having.  I thought he was going to continue on with that thought, but then he waffled and did almost a complete turn around.  One lady seemed all alone, sitting in the front row ...crying.   And my insides were crying out with her.


I thought, will we soon go there also, with debating the quality of life for our parents?  And I've already read a horrific article from a magazine on medical ethics, reasoning that if the quality of life becomes too much to bear for a Mom, that she should be able to decide whether the life of her baby, already born, should be privileged enough to continue life, or merely cease to exist.


All of us have had to cope with life, and cope with having someone we know die.  I don't want to go more into the planning of death ...of the nature of planning the exact date, and the method of instituting it.  That is beyond absurd ...and I can't believe anyone could disagree that it is horrific.  I consider it evil. 


Most other deaths fall into a category which I feel all deaths should fall into ...where we don't know of the time or the place. But there are some occasions when we anticipate death may be near, especially concerning health issues with little chance of recovery, or occasions where there is an increased likelihood of additional attacks.  How do we prepare ourselves with coping with that?  Do we look at it like just another inevitable end?  Many events in life have an end.  We may feel our health would be better if we didn't drink so much, or smoke so much.   We may consider it best we quit all at once, or perhaps easier if we just gradually wean ourselves of it.  How would it sound if we treat people the same way?   "Well, if they are going to die ...I don't feel like I want to take the chance of being around.   I'd feel better not to be around them."  or  "Well, we are going to have to get used to them not being around some day, so let's start seeing them less and less.  If we spend less time with them now, we'll get used to not having them around, and it will be easier later."  Then, later, "No sense beating ourselves up with guilt over it."  or  "Such a miserable person ...couldn't get along with anyone.  Probably was happier being left alone anyway.  It was best for everyone."


I prefer the way my brothers are ...and am so thankful for the things they do.  How other people have come to think the other way ...I don't know.   It's like we lost conscience.  Or believed in the "con" of science, of the school of evolution ...leaving out God.  Without God, there is no conscience, because it is really not conscience ...it was really God in the first place.   And putting God anywhere but first ...will inevitable just lead us astray.   It is difficult enough to stay on the straight path with God, resisting temptation and the worldly-wise ways ...I would contend it's impossible without God.  


My favorite "Little House on the Prairie" episode is a two-parter, entitled, "Remember Me".   Remembering is much like how we live.  If we live with bitterness, guilt, regret, or denial ...our memories will often be affected by those things, and we will develop coping mechanisms that influence future behaviors ...leading to unnecessary suffering for our families, perhaps generations to come.   If we live happy, content, and true to ourselves ...then our memories will be ones we can build upon, and share with future generations for the betterment of everyone.